Last week was a crazy, busy, overwhelming week. I decided to let my Monday post go for my own sanity.
As I move on to a new week, I am learning to let go of things, picking my battles with my kids while continuing to focus on me. When I let life get in the way of taking care of me, everything goes downhill and then I self defeat. I can only control my actions, my words and how I react to difficult situations. For me this is a battle I have fought for many, many, many years. Control is definitely my worst learned behavior and the most difficult to overcome. I will make positive strides forward, then fall backwards repeating the same viscous cycle over and over again. It is so engrained inside my head. I act without even thinking it’s that natural for me. This is one characteristic of being a Co-dependent person
Here is how I know I’m getting sucked back into the viscous cycle:
- My shoulders are so tight, my neck is so stiff and I can literally feel the stress taking over my body.
- My anxiety levels skyrocket and I find myself wanting to throw a tantrum because life isn’t going the way I think it should be.
- I become exhausted. Every ounce of energy I have, has been drained from me.
- I want to go to sleep, my brain shuts down, mentally & physically I can’t go on. Sleeping has become my way of coping. My brain shuts off, I’m relaxed, and I’m avoiding life for the time being.
Guess what? This is only a temporary fix and it will still be there when I wake up. Sleeping is a terrible coping mechanism.
- What I need to do at this point is focus on the things I can change/control and let go of what I can’t change/control. Recognizing and learning to let go of the control is the first step. I write down everything I am feeling in my journal.
- Make a list of what I can control and a list of what I can’t control.
- I prioritize what I can control, I try to let go of what I can’t control & I choose living instead of living by trying to control the things I can’t control.
Recognizing what I am doing mentally & physically to my body is the first step for me. Stressing over this can only lead you to a more negative, unhappy & miserable life.
I choose not to live this way!